Heart burns…

I started experiencing a different kind of discomfort for this pregnancy – heart burns. Its making me jump, i hate heart burns…

Right, i forgot to mentioned this chronic illness i have, its related to indigestion… something like… my digestive systems dont function as well as most people and i get uncomfortable after meals…  Although i am not new to heart burns, i just hate it more with my condition now. I am already having difficulties consuming, yeah, i havent got back my appettite… and now everything made worse with heart burns… its like that stupid twitching sensation in the chest and i feel breathless everytime it happens…

I cant wait for the end of the 1st trimester… everyone says things will get better and i cant wait.

Husband texted and asked, “How’s baby doing today?”

I said, “Baby’s good and busy growing…”

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Old wives’ tale…

At 8th week…

*Courtesy of http://www.wprc.org/fetal.phtml
I guess i am better at dealing with my pregnancy already. Last week was madness and i suffered a fair bit due to the nausea… and its affecting my work. I hope this week it’ll get better.

Heard a few old wives’ tales on how to predict the sex of my unborn child. Some say put a red thread around my wedding band and pull it above my right palm… if the ring swings front and back or left and right… it’ll be a boy, but if it swings round and round, then it’ll be a girl… Kind of amazed, how could the ring move by itself?… I’d tried it… and the ring swing side by side… i tried again and again, the results is always the same. Hmm…

Before i was pregnant, i had always wanted to have boy, i even had a name for him already!… This, i attribute partly to the fact that i had a girl already and partly to my mother’s influence since young. My mother had 5 daughters and she was under very strong pressure to produce a male heir to the family. So dreaming about having a boy is somewhat like helping my mother to fulfill her wish…

But now, i dont really care about the baby being a boy or a girl. Nevermind the tiredness, the awfulness… initial crampings, the nausea, and i know i’d look like shit for the past weeks… somehow, i just want the child to be healthy, i know deep down, no matter what’s the sex of the baby… Husband and I will still love him or her with all our heart. Just like all the parents in the world.

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Worst Day So Far…

I am having the worst day today so far in my near to seven weeks of pregnancy. My nausea is taking its toll from bad to worst and i had lost my good appetite… I ran to the bathroom several time today, trying to force myself to throw up. I thought if i could throw up some, it might help me feel better. But nothing came out and i felt worst.

I also started having runny nose, i am not sure if this is a symptom of early pregnancy or that i am simply gon’ to get a cold. I keep my fingers crossed and i hope hard that it’ll be the former. Falling sick while pregnant is no joke…

Friends suggested to me to have some crackers (square biscuits), said it would ease a little… though it normally work well if they’re taken first thing in the morning before getting up of bed, i tried nevertheless… I just want to feel better… and yeah, it does ease a little.. and the nausea came back 5 mins later and then shortly, the smell of crackers made me sick in the stomach… and i gave up.

Bet my nose are red from all those nose-blowings and scuffy tissues papers on my desk and hand covering my mouth all day… dont help at all… last thing i want is to arouse any suspicion in my place of work. I mustnt let anyone know i am pregnant… at least for now.

Shopping for Maternity Clothes…

Started shopping online for maternity wear. Relatives from States coming back to Singapore this month end, so I can buy and ship it to their places for them to bring back to me… Well planned indeed…

So excited…

I had bought myself pants and jeans that is good through 9 months. I am desperate for bottoms now as i could no longer squeezed into mine. Even casual demin shorts are nightmare for me now and i can only hold on tightly to the only 1 pair of drawstring shorts that i have.

Its funny that i cant wait for my bump to show. But i know once i have it for a few months, i will be so huge and cumbersome that i couldnt wait to have the baby born and bump gone… haha, how fickle i can be.

Very tired today, very sleepy… i hope this tiredness will go away soon.

Not a good night…

Been to my first antenatal check-up yesterday… my OB Gynae’s clinic is very near to our place. Husband and i met up after work, slightly earlier and very excited…

The clinic was packed with people… despite having booked our appointment early last week, we had to wait like some 20 minutes before its our turn. It was the first time i saw a male OB Gynae and i guess i must had acted a little uptight during the ultra sound scanning. Thank goodness Husband was with me all the while and it really did help as i have been paranoid ever since i knew about this pregnancy.

We couldnt really get a clear scan of the baby, nevertheless, the visitation was enjoyable on the whole as my doctor kept us well informed of the things that we ought to know. After payment, the clinic assistant gave us a goodie bag, in it was some milk powder for pregnant and breastfeeding women and other goodies…

I tried the milk at home and i didnt like the taste… Husband commented the milk doesnt look appealing at all… i said, “It is indeed… but its all for the good of our unborn child”…

I finished the milk and soon, i fell asleep.

I didnt really get a good night sleep as i kept waking up with a pulling, painful sensation in my stomach… i ran to the bathroom a few times but the upset stomach wont ease. At one point, i actually thought i am going to miscarriage due to the pain… I wonder how i fell back to sleep after all the runnings… i guess i must be exhausted to core…
I am not sure if i should put the blame on the milk powder, I will monitor a few days and see how it’ll go.

Small thought: “Sometimes i got this funny feeling when i touch my stomach and sometimes i wonder if its possible that i could be carrying twins… Haha… is it normal for me to feel this way…? Guess i will know in my next antenatal visitation”

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A new week…

I am coming towards the end of 5 weeks and soon, i will be 6 weeks into my pregnancy… I am doing good on the whole, despite some discomfort like frequent urination urge and swollen breasts… I wont get nauseous unless there’s fish near me, cooked or raw. I always like to include fish in my meals before this but now i really couldnt stand the smell.

Husband is going to bring me and daughter to the shopping mall later, i need to get myself some new clothes as i could no longer fit into my pants and tight jeans… Friends told me that being a second-time mother, i will be getting the pregnancy bump much earlier. I am not too sure if it is true, but i guess its good to heed their advices and start to shop early for maternity wear. Oh yah, i need to get another pair of flat sandal…

Last check on the internet, this is how my baby should look like by the end of this week…

I showed daughter this picture from the website www.pregnancy.org She exclaimed, she cannot believe little bro or sister is so small inside my tummy…

Then she wrote me a note (pardon her six year old english):

A Pregnant Woman

1. Not say cannot do house work, only can do a little bit

2. Must be very careful of glass on the floor

3. When you are a pregnant woman is the queen in the house now

 She is such a darling angel…

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Its affecting my work

Being pregnant is good. Yes, but it is affecting my work… (not good). I am feeling so so so so sleepy…. I couldnt stand it at times, i dozed off in front of my computer… Those numbers and spreadsheets are not encouraging at all in keeping me alert, or at least, awake.

Husband is bringing me to a Buffet Dinner at Swissotel Merchant Court this evening. I am looking forward to it… these days, i find myself only… looking forwards to food and rest. Nothing else spur an interest in me…

I think i am too active to be pregnant… I walk fast, i run at times when the printer churn out confidential documents faster than i expect it and fearing my colleague would get them before i do… I also sit with a “thurp” at times, lucky that i have a good cushioned arm-chair for my work-station… i think i really need to make lots of adjustment to my new condition now.

Sister went lunch with me yesterday, was so worried that she held my arms and ask me, “Have you forgot that you are pregnant now? Slow down…!”

I told Husband last night about this problem i have, he laugh for a while then, his faced turned serious suddenly… and warned me to be more careful… i bet he must be worried about me and and the child in me.

Going away…

I have plans to go away for a short trip… I know going away on a trip at this time will be kind of risky for me, so i have to be very careful. Yah, i know, but i do not want to disappoint my firstborn… It is now, or a good 9-10 months later…

I am so so excited and scared at the same time and everything’s like new too me (afterall, it had been 6 years)… and worst of all, i have to hide the elation, just to be safe… Imagine your heart bursting with joy, and what you really like to do is to shout at the top of your voice, announcing to everyone what you are going through now… but you cant, and you have to be cool about it…

Calling…

I cant help it anymore, i think i have to tell someone about it or else i will go crazy! But Husband and I both think that it is critical to get the result from the doctor before we let out the news… I agree…

Doctor finally called at 5.30pm, after i had called the his clinic 3 times pressing for an answer…

“Congratulations madam, Its positive!”

I told my mum, she is elated with joy.

I think my baby will be due in July next year… I am so excited, but I am scared to know how fast all this is getting… I had just married my husband for less than a month and me and my first-born (oh yah, she’s a girl if i had not mentioned before) are still trying to adapt to our new living arrangements. With a new baby on the way, i wonder how we’ll cope.

I have to start taking care of myself already. I need to be healthy for my baby.

The wait…

It really amazing to know how nature had made you the way you are… The last time i was pregnant with a child (6 years ago), I had this funny feeling in the guts… something in me was growing, and i knew it well before i did the home pregnancy test… Of course it wasnt planned, and I was very helpless being only 16.

For the past few days, I woke up with a funny sensation in my stomach. Somewhat like what i had 6 years ago. Could it really be what we’ve been wanting? I remember the indicator on the home-pregnancy test showing a negative 3 days ago, but something in me triggered and this morning i put together the courage to try again.

I had probably stayed in my bathroom for some 5 minutes… before i finally peeped on the test-kit… Probably this brand works better? I must be smiling when the test-kit indicated a positive sign… I cannot believe it.

So the next thing i know is climbing onto the bed, gently teasing the sound-asleep Husband, “Dear wake up… i have something to tell you…”

“Huuuuhhhhh…..” yawned my husband

“I am pregnant!”

“You did the test?” Husband’s look at me… I love the smile on his face…

“Mmm. Its a positive.”

We hugged for a while and i told him we have to visit the family doctor to confirm it before we tell anyone about this.

Happily we went to the clinic and doctor asked me some questions, tested my blood pressure and finally, the test for existance of hcG in my urine. We waited for a while, my first-born impatiently flipping through the limited library of children’s book in the waiting room… and when the doctor called my name… we proceeded, only to get an equivocal positive – meaning “not exactly pregnant”.

Doctor said it could be too early now to get a result from my urine sample. Hence he suggested a blood test.

We gladly complied… however, i tried not to feel too upset by it… but i must say i am affected in a way for not able to get a clear and distinct result. I hate to wait, its unbearable. Hopefully we will be able to know by this Tuesday.